This is our vacation week, so it’s time once again to play the game of “Where in the World is Stevie Mac?” Last year, we wanted to visit a place with nice sights, great beer, and, most of all, zero chance of terrorism. We chose Belgium. Let that sink in for a moment. This year should be easier. The animating factors in 2016 — fear of jet-lag, fear of poverty, and, yet again, fear of terrorism – conspired to keep us fear-ly close to home. Enjoy these hints:
- Hello misnomer!
- It never ratified the 18th amendment (prohibition – so, yes, this is our kind of place).
- There is a specific law against biting off someone’s leg. (The legislators here have obviously gotten a little too into The Walking Dead.)
- The first American ever jailed for driving his car too fast earned that distinction by going a rip-roaring 15 mph here in 1904.
- Cap guns are illegal in this state.
- You will be fined if you throw pickle juice on a public trolley. That rule will frustrate the DDL Son to no end.
- Finally, our all-time favorite basketball player, Marvin Barnes, hailed from these parts. Barnes (nicknamed “Bad News”) was part of a gang of high schoolers arrested for robbing a bus. The victim had no trouble identifying Barnes, who had been wearing a letter jacket with his name embroidered on it. That brush with the law did not stop Bad News (later shortened to “News”) from having a remarkable hoops career. Barnes began his professional career with the ABA’s St. Louis Spirits. Once upon a time, his team was scheduled to fly home from Louisville at 8 o’clock. Because of the East-to-Central time zone change, the flight was scheduled to arrive in St. Louis at 7:56. Barnes refused to board the flight. In his immortal words, “I ain’t getting on no time machine.” Instead, he rented a car and drove home. Sadly, Barnes died way too young (62) a couple of years ago. Let’s pour out a little White Ship Lovecraft IPA in his honor this week.